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Bad Shape

A man returns from Africa feeling very ill. He visits his doctor, who immediately rushes the guy to the Mayo Clinic.

The man wakes up to the ringing of a telephone in a stark room at the hospital and answers it. “We’ve received the results from your tests,” says the doctor on the other end of the line. “Bad news—you have Ebola.”

“Oh, my God,” cries the man. “Doc! What am I going to do?”

“Don’t worry. First, we’re going to put you on a diet of pizza, pancakes, and pita bread,” says the doctor.

“Will that cure me?”

“No, but it’s the only food we’ll be able to get under the door.”
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