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| Lawyers Q&AQ: What do you call 20 lawyers skydiving?A: Skeet.
 
 Q: What do lawyers use for birth control?
 A: Their personalities.
 
 Q: What is the difference between a tick and a lawyer?
 A: A tick falls off of you when you die.
 
 Q: Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?
 A: To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
 
 Q: What do you have when 100 lawyers are buried up to their neck in sand?
 A: Not enough sand.
 
 Q: What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?
 A: There are skid marks in front of the dog.
 
 Q: What is black and brown and looks good on a lawyer?
 A: A Doberman.
 
 Q: Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?
 A: If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
 
 Q: What do lawyers and sperm have in common?
 A: One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
 
 Q: Did you hear that the Post Office just recalled their latest stamps?
 A: They had pictures of lawyers on them ... and people couldn't figure out which side to spit on.
 
 Q: What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pit bull?
 A: Lipstick.
 
 Q:You're trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake, and a lawyer.
 A:You have a gun with two bullets. What should you do? Shoot the lawyer. Twice.
 
 
 More Lawyer Jokes:No Need To Pay
 My Daddy Is A Lawyer
 
 Lawyer Hater
 
 Lawyer In Hell
 
 Overcrowded Heaven
 
 12 Feet Deep
 
 Lawyers Jury
 
 Real Things Said In Court
 
 Engineer In Hell
 
 Corruption
 
 
 
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