Antidepressant Medications
Handle stress, elevate the mood,
treat anxiety disorders.
Shared Movies
Over 80 Million Movies and TV-Shows
No Charge per movie, No download limit!
Casino Classic
Best Online Casino!
Get $500 free on the house!
Weight Loss Supplements
Natural supplements that burn body fat,
suppress appetite and support a healthy diet.

Adult Jokes

Animal Jokes

Bar Jokes

Blonde Jokes

Children Jokes

Chuckcha Jokes

College Jokes

Computer Jokes

Deep Thoughs

Dirty Jokes

Family Jokes

Fart Jokes

Funny Quotes

Gender Jokes

Jew Jokes

Knock Knock Jokes

Lawyer Jokes

Medical Jokes

Military Jokes

Misc Jokes

Mother in Law Jokes

New-Russian Jokes

Political Jokes

Redneck Jokes

Relationship Jokes

Religious Jokes

Sports Jokes

Traffic Cop Jokes

Yo Mama Jokes

Post Your Joke or Anecdote

Live Long

A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc, I would like to live very long. What should I do?"

"I think that is a wise decision," the doctor replies. "Let's see, do you smoke?"

"Oh.. Half a pack a day."

"Starting NOW, no more smoking." The man agrees.

The doctor then asks, "Do you drink?"

"Oh, well Doc, not much, just a bit of wine with my meals, and a beer or two every once in a while."

"Starting now, you drink only water. No exceptions."

The man is a bit upset, but also agrees.

The doctor asks, "How do you eat?"

"Oh, well, you know, Doc, normal stuff."

"Starting now you are going on a very strict diet. You are going to eat only raw vegetables, with no dressing, and non-fat cottage cheese."

The man is now really worried. "Doc, is all this really necessary?"

"Do you want to live long?"

"Yes."

"Well then, it's absolutely necessary. And don't even think of breaking the diet." The man is quite restless, but the doctor continues, "Do you have sex?"

"Yeah, once a week or so..., only with my wife!" he adds hurriedly.

"As soon as you get out of here you are going to buy twin beds. No more sex for you. None."

The man is appalled. "Doc... Are you sure I'm going to live longer this way?"

"I have no idea, but whatever you live, I assure you is going to seem like an eternity!"

Rate this joke (bigger is better): 1 2 3 4 5
Current rating: 3

More Misc Jokes:

The Photographer

Sins Of 3 NUns

Michael Jackson- Carrier Bag

Calling In Sick

Fore!

Insulting Comment

A Definite Definition

Supplies

Fucked Duck

Only In America!








Ads: