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Bad Martha Tips

Bad Tips from Martha Stewart:

Old telephone books make ideal personal address books. Simply cross out the names and addresses of people you
don't know.

Fool other drivers into thinking you have an expensive car phone by holding an old TV or video remote control up to your ear and occasionally swerving across the road and mounting the curb.

Avoid parking tickets by leaving your windshield wipers turned to fast wipe whenever you leave your car parked illegally.

No time for a bath? Wrap yourself in masking tape and remove the dirt by simply peeling it off.

Apply red nail polish to your nails before clipping them. The red nails will be much easier to spot on your bathroom carpet. (Unless you have a red carpet, in which case a contrasting polish should be selected.)

If a person is choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a jug of boiling water down their throat and presto! The blockage is almost nstantly removed.
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More Misc Jokes:

Polish Sausage

Ohh Crap

Criminal Hall of Shame

Thank Stalin

Olympic Ice-Skating

Making The Forest Healthy

Breaking and Entering

Very Drunk

Ice Fishing

Bad News








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