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Top 10 Drugged Cartoons

10. Gargamel (From the Smurfs)
Most likely LSD. Spends his life in pursuit of little blue guys
in sissy white outfits and mentally abusing his cat. What does
he plan to do with the blue dwarfs when he catches them anyway?

9. Olive Oyl
Probably Dexatrim abuse, maybe some amphetamines. Who is that
skinny?! She might even be anorexic, she is always giving her
burger to her friend. One side question, what the hell are Popeye
and Brutus thinking? What is it, her personality? NOT!

8. Snagglepuss
Can't explain it. Maybe it's the name, or the look, but he is
suspicious.

7. He-Man
This is an easy one. I mean c'mon. Roid monkey #1. "BY THE POWER
OF ANABOL!!!!!!" Makes me want to root for Skeletor. Alone in
his castle, hitting the weights. And on top of that he even
injects the shit in his pet tiger. Can we say "Animal Abuse"?

6.& 5. Yogi and Boo Boo
We all know what is really in those picnic baskets. They go back
to the cave and trip. Another side? -- Are they gay? I mean, take
a look at BooBoo. Not that there's anything wrong with that...

4. Droopy
The number one downer abuser in toon land. Can't someone slip
him an upper every year or two. The only time I ever saw him
happy is when he sees the picture of the babe. Sort of makes you
wonder.

3. Dopey Dwarf
He openly admits it. The other dwarfs deny involvement but they
are under investigation. Allegations are that Doc is writing
some extra scripts for Sneezy and all the guys partaking are
afloat.

2. Daffy Duck
If he isn't using crack, Marion Barry is clean. He is so wired
he bounces around on his head without pain. Blows his beak off
all the time. Some symptoms might be from "daffiness" but Haldol
wouldn't work for him.

1. Shaggy
By far the #1 suspect. His clothes, his hair, his bad goatee,
the boy converses with dogs. But all of this is nothing until
you go to the Munchie Factor. Anybody who averages 9.3 dog treats
consumed per episode smokes pot, no if, ands, or, buts about it.
And look at the way him and his friends painted that van! Pretty
rad design dude.

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